Welcome to the forum, grammom!
I don't make candles, so I can't help you there, but there is a Candlemaking section on this forum. I'm sure lots of folks can help you with any candlemaking questions there.
As far as the lye goes, all soap is made with lye. If you are wanting to make soap without having to mess around with sodium hydroxide (lye) yourself, you might enjoy melt-and-pour soaping. With M&P soaping, the soap is already made for you. You start with a soap base that you cut up, melt down, color and fragrance, and mold. The best part about M&P soap is that it's ready to use as soon as it's hardened - no curing time! There is a melt-and-pour section here as well so check it out, too.
Welcome again, and have fun!